the saga continues
Mood:  down
insomnia sux.

so my man and i went to see a doc the day before yesterday, and i ended up with a prescription from ambien.

so the first night i took it, i was expecting a good muscle-relaxant type buzz, but no. i sat here for an hour playing some random web game, then went to lay down.

the last thing i remember was telling my husband at 2am when he came to bed "i'm not asleep."

the next night i took it (tonight/last night/whatever), i puked a halfhour later, went to bed, woke up at 2:30 and here i am again. *sigh*

life in austin kinda sux right now. of course, its up to me to do something about that, and i just don't have the motivation....vicious cycle.

hmmmmmmmmmm

and so it begins.....
Mood:  not sure
I've never blogged before, and I still consider it a ridiculous notion. But alas...insomnia has plagued me for several nights now and my head is just too full of crap.

So, for the past week or so, my various solutions have involved various forms of OTC pain meds like Exedrin PM, pointless surfing, and horror-of-all-horrors....just about every yahoo webgame available. And I've upped my zoloft dosage by 50mg.

All to no avail.

I figured I'd write in one of my notebooks--try to empty out some of all this boring shit spinning around in my head....but I have this thing about journaling, I just can't bring myself to do it. I have this superstition that if I commit something meaningful to paper it will accelerate entropy...you know, the rate at which all things decay. May sound odd, but it goes back to my teenage years and WAY too many melodramtic rantings about various crushes on various boys...various heartbreaks and various idiodic sagas.

So, I guess we'll try this blogging thing. Can't hurt.

Ummm...lesseeee. I'm a chick. I was born and raised in the most boring state in the US--but thankfully in the only liberal oasis in said state. More than a quarter century in the same town with the same people and the same surroundings.

I moved a few months ago...700 miles southwest, to a bigger liberal oasis in a bigger, not-so-boring state--a place that everyone told me I'd love.

So far, all I can really say about it is that I like the weather.

And a few weeks before I moved, I got hitched. That's a good story...maybe later though....let's just say it wasn't conventional.

Ok, so the moral of this story is that my life is COMPLETELY 100% different than it was a few months ago when I was finally beginning to feel comfortable with the status quo as it was. I quit my job of 2 years, said goodbye to my family, packed up the cats and settled in with my new man.

So now I'm unemployed....in a strange city....bored.....and feeling a little on edge about this situation.

And to complicate things, the old man is trying to come off his paxil and is fighting panic attacks...poor guy. It's really hard when both of us are in this mode--I want to take care of him, but I'm left wondering who's gonna take care of me?

I'll cut it off there for now...topics up for discussion are:

blogging; ridiculous notions; Lawrence, KS; Austin, TX; SRI's; boredom; non-conventional hitchings; insomnia; superstitions; etc.

Tell me what you think. I'll try to be more thought provoking next time.